IS MARRIAGE COMPULSORY?

marriage is bliss.

If you are an African, living in Africa and you above twenty years already but single, you need to read this. Marriage in Africa is considered very important and even an achievement (lol).

 To be sincere, marriage is good. It is very good. it has many advantages. Imagine the joy of getting home in the evening, sapped, tired or even frustrated from work and instead of meeting an empty house, you are met at the door with smiles and affection. Imagine the bliss of having someone to take care of things that you are too busy to handle yourself. Imagine having someone to talk to when you are bored, lonely or sad. Imagine having little kids to play with and rolled on the floor with in the morning.
Dear reader(s), advantages of marriage are innumerable.
Yet, it has its pains.

As good as marriage is, it has its attendant problems. These problems are as countless as its advantages. Imagine the misunderstandings, the silences because neither you nor your partner is ready to apologize first. Imagine seeing your things misplaced and sometimes carelessly placed. Imagine seeing your favourite channel and someone asking you to tune to another channel! Imagine the complaints and the nagging. The list is endless.

Domestic violence.

So, is it a must that we  marry?

Well, it depends on the way you see it. It is a choice that you have to make but in Africa, parents, friends and concerned extended family members  don't see it as a choice, rather, they see it as a COMPULSION.
The moment you are getting to thirty in Africa, people will begin to ask you loudly about that person you wish to marry. They don't want to know that you are not ready or not intending to get married. if you tell them that you are not ready, they will ask you what you are waiting for.

What Qualifies One For Marriage?

 Someone must be physically, emotionally, financially and mentally ready before considering marriage. The fact that someone is working in a plush company or establishment, collecting nice salary, living in a posh house and driving fast car is not a qualification for marriage. Being twenty or thirty years old is also not a qualification.


That's why there are so many failed marriages in Africa. In most cases, many couples in Africa lack one or two qualifications of marriage.  Many people in the world today are married because they are twenty or thirty years old. It doesn't matter that they are jobless. It doesn't matter that they are barely feeding themselves. It doesn't matter that they get angry at the slightest provocation (and people like this turn to bullies in their homes after marriage). It doesn't matter that they are not mentally matured, all that matters to them is that they have reached a certain age in which the society expects them to get married so they get into it.

I have heard it many times from different sources, even from people that i hold in high esteem, saying that people should get married irrespective of their current financial, emotional or mental situation that with marriage, everything will come. many marriages have been formed through this erroneous belief and I have never for once seeing any of these promised changes coming into reality after such marriages.

Dear readers, do not be pushed into marriage. Go into it when you are ready for it. There is no fixed time for marriage. You can go into it when you are ready. Neither is there a late comer in marriage, we all get into it when we are ready and if you are never ready, it is not a compulsion. You can still live a prosperous, happy and fruitful life without necessarily being married. The fact that others are getting married every time around you does not mean that you must do the same. Take your time, prepare yourself for it before you join the bandwagon.

Remember, many people are stuck in marriage today because they were not ready for it. Many men and women go to bed each night with heavy hearts and wake up in the morning with sorrows because they are stuck with partners that make life hellish for them. Where then is the sense in unnecessarily making life unbearable for oneself? You owe nobody your marriage certificate, if you don't want to marry, that is your decision and nobody, not even your parents should make it a compulsion for you.

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